Courting the Devil

The Man - Be Mine.

When I first began putting down ideas for what would become Gilda Sue Rosenstern: The Motion Picture!, there was one role that, due to its eerie but oddly charming nature, I couldn’t imagine anyone playing but Robin Spriggs.

In addition to being an accomplished actor, Robin also happens to be the author of some of the strangest but most beautiful books I’ve ever read. Plus, he’s a magician, and I don’t mean the stage kind either. So I sent him a description of the character I had in mind (a sort of interdimensional gypsy-cowboy) and asked if he was interested. Much to my delight (and a little to my dread), he said yes.

Later on, as I found myself vajazzle-deep in the writing of the actual screenplay (my first, I might add) and feeling not a little meshuga, I thought, “Wait a minute, Gilda Sue. You’ve got Robin damn Spriggs in your cast. Why not wise up and ask him to sign on as co-writer, too?” So I did. And again he said yes. That’s when things got really strange—not only in the movie about my life, but in my very life itself. Big shock, I know. But the real shock, especially if you’re only familiar with Robin’s spookier qualities, was how funny he turned out to be. And I do mean “funny ha ha.”

So yes, as expected, Robin Spriggs brought the strange to Gilda Sue Rosenstern: The Motion Picture!, but he also brought a whole lot of hilarity. And magic, too, of course. So color me triple blessed. And triple grateful, too.

—Gilda Sue Rosenstern

P.S. Gilda Sue Rosenstern: The Motion Picture! is finally in the can. That means we’ve shot it, but it doesn’t mean it’s done. If you’re a fan of Robin Spriggs and would like to play a part in unleashing this crazy bit of uniqueness on the world, you can do so by contributing to our post-production Kickstarter campaign. Thank you in advance for your love and patronage, and welcome to the team. Bye now!

Glimpses of Droom – #1

The co-writer for “Gilda Sue Rosenstern: The Motion Picture!” He’s funny AND dark. (Not to mention super brainy!)

Robin Spriggs

Ozman Droom in Ozman Droom in “Ozmandroomunculus”

“It turns Its eye, Its single eye, from dream to dream to dream, and spies in each a dream undreamt of tales as yet untold, of Monstrous Things that cannot be yet come to be withal, upon a whirling sphere of blue (inward grown and lost to time), where Then and Now, and Here and There, and You and It . . . are One.”—The Untold Tales of Ozman Droom

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“The Movie About My Very Life Rages On” OR “Looking For Mr. Handle Bar”

Hello, Lovelies!

Greetings form Movieland! Take a look at my movie date with Mr. Right! We didn’t have a bicycle built for two, but then neither did Paul Newman and Katherine Ross, and they remain iconic cinematic lovers to this day. (We had a teensy bit of trouble, it’s true. But it’ll be fine. Don’t plotz, y’all!)

Stay tuned! There’s more to come. (See that PayPal button over there? Clicking it and giving us whatever you can will help keep the ball rolling. Thanks a ton!)

Cheers!

-Gilda Sue

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A SEASON IN CARCOSA Book Review, Y’all!

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A SEASON IN CARCOSA is a real-real cute anthology of short stories. Y’all should read it, unless you are like me, and you are completely unfamiliar with the works of a fellow named Robert W. Chambers. Or perhaps, especially if you are like me, and you are completely unfamiliar with the works of a fellow named Robert W. Chambers. I can’t decide.

To be honest with y’all, there are some stories in this book I didn’t totally understand, because they seem dependent upon my having read these so-called “king in yellow” stories, which clearly have something to do with a mask, and some lady in desperate need of a tanning bed. Oh, and a King of some country so poor that even he can’t afford to wear more than tattered clothes (all yellow). Like I said, I’ve not read those yellow stories, but this book makes me want to. 

There are some stories, though, that stand alone and are good reads with or without references to everything I just wrote about in the previous paragraph. I really like “It Sees Me When I’m Not Looking” by Gary McMahon. The main guy drinks a lot of whiskey and engages in sexual activity, and sort of reminds me of Bukowski, which rocks. Joe Pulver’s “Not Enough Hope“ is super good. It has Karl Edward Wagner in it, which you don’t see every day. His story totally makes me want to change my name to Cassilda Sue. I dig Cate Gardner’s “Yellow Bird Strings.” It feels like a dream, plus it has puppets and celebrities. Who doesn’t dig puppets and celebrities? And I love Robin Spriggs’s “Salvation in Yellow.” This story is about a gal living in a nightmare house that’s totally haunted by Daddy and Jesus, which I think everyone can relate to. It’s filled with images (both terrifying and sad) that keep me up some nights, y’all, no matter how many Drambuie-Toddies I have. And isn’t that what reading stories is all about?

I totally recommend that y’all read A SEASON IN CARCOSA. It’s edited by German Joe Pulver, and I give it 9 knishes and 3 latkes.

Buy it here:

The Movie About My Very Life

Hello, Lovelies!

Greetings from an honest-to-goodness movie set. That’s right. The Gilda Sue Rosenstern Computer Internet Show movie is back on track.

Again.

This past weekend, my small-but-fabulous crew met up at a camper van back behind the Farmers Market to shoot a small-but-fabulous scene for the movie about my very life. Y’all, it rained, but it also rocked.

ImageThis time Colonel Bruce Hampton of surrealist (absurdist?) rock-n-roll (blues/country/jazz?) musical fame joined in the fun. We didn’t think the movie about my very life could get weirder, y’all, but we were wrong. The Colonel brought much-welcomed weirdness. Thank God. (Thank Bruce!)

IMG_1378Deb Evans, whose van made it all possible, was our hostess with the mostess. Folks, I couldn’t be more grateful for her.
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I’d also like to thank Tom Roche, John Prew, Pe’lar Bell, and Josh Williamson for being good humored, resourceful, creative, and above all, real-real cute. My life is nothing without y’all!

Stay tuned folks. More to come!

Cheers!

“A Few Good Menschen.” Or “One of These Things is Not Like The Others.”

One of These Things is Not Like the Others.Y’all, just look at me shmoozing with these Hollywood/NYC Big Wigs.

These two cute men are John Markus and Mark St. Germaine. They have written plays, produced television shows, and eaten bar-b-que. They’ve rubbed elbows with the likes of Bill Cosby, Ellen Degeneres, Typhoid Mary, and God only knows who else. They’ve even dared to mix Atlanta theater legend Tom Key with barbershop quartet harmonies right there on the Theatrical Outfit stage. I KNOW! In front of God and everybody.

Also, just recently, they teetered lovingly on the edge of a half-fake loveseat and drank totally real champagne with me on the set of the world premiere of their play, The Fabulous Lipitones. No, really. They did. And here’s the proof.

Stay tuned for their visit to The Gilda Sue Rosenstern Computer Internet Show.

No! Really!

Gilda Sue Gives Fabulous Lip (itone) Service

Gilda Sue Gives Fabulous Lip (itone) Service

Y’all, here I am with Mark St. Germaine (Gilda right) and John Markus (Gilda left) on the set of the world premier of their play The Fabulous Lipitones at The Theatrical Outfit in Atlanta. These two cute men are veterans of stage and TV, and I got to sit down with them for a sip and a chat last week. We talked about Bill Cosby, alien abduction, computer dating and other stuff. It rocked so hard we taped it. Stay tuned for the upcoming episode!

My New Catch Phrase!!!

Hello, lovelies!

I’m real-real excited to announce my new catch phrase. I’ve been searching and searching ever since the Paula Deen incident. (Oy!)

My new catch phrase is inspired by my love of Drambuie, “the drink that satisfies.”

Drambuie was my Granny O’Donahue’s favorite, and we would always have one before hitting the hay. Well, we’d have one, then she’d say “Can’t fly on just one wing!” and then we’d have another. Sometimes it took us three wings to get off the couch and into the bed. Ah. . . memories.

So, inspired by Granny’s (and my) love of Drambuie, I’ve decided that my new catch phrase is “the half-Jew that satisfies.

Don’t y’all love it?!

Wait.

Or should it be “the half-shikse that satisfies” . . .?

Oy.

Maybe I still need your help.

What do y’all think? Which should it be?

Cheers, y’all. And thanks!

Next time y'all need to look like a rock star for the cover of Jewtopia Monthly, Josh Lamkin should take your picture! Lamkinator@gmail.com.

Read the Gilda Sue’s Mail Bag Archives! The Best Advice on the Computer Internet!

Y’all, I was recently combing through Gilda Sue’s Mail Bag. So many letters have come in that need my attention. If you’re thinking of asking me for The Best Advice on the Computer Internet, take a minute to look through past letters here:

http://gildasuerosenstern.com/gilda-sues-mail-bag/

. We may have addressed your dilemma. If not, please feel free to write me.

Good luck!